Please provide me suggestions and feedbacks on #21997032 so that I can provide a better design for your brand.

Sir!
I submit my entries Please have a look on #22017945, #22017946.
and please let me know am I on a write track.
Please provide good feedback on each designer entry you like that, if you don't like just eliminate that, please do not provide under 3 stars it badly impacts on designer career.
Thanks a lot.